Box Full of Darkness
I open this box again.
Its dark demons still survive there.
The bruises, the slaps, the cuts-
Pain still runs deep in the scars.
You told someone recently you remembered me fondly.
And my snort of derision was a surprise.
Maybe a slap back.
But this ‘box full of darkness’ has risen again.
No longer all neatly wrapped and stored in the attic of my heart,
Where it had burned a hole.
White hot with searing anger,
With anguish and betrayal.
And as I gaze upon this box, I know it is never forgotten.
But it no longer defines me.
Abused, Used, Victim!
No this box I hold, shows me I am a survivor.
I have risen. Strong of heart, shame resilient.
And while I may feel some residual pain,
And a tear may appear at the corner of my eye,
This box, oh this holy, blessed box is your gift to me.
One you never knew you gave me,
Perhaps the only one you ever gave me.
And so I keep this ‘box full of darkness’
Neatly wrapped in the attic of my heart,
Where now it holds a special place on the altar of my soul.
© Donna Donabella 2016
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift.” ~Mary Oliver
I read this quote some time ago, but could not wrap my brain around it. How could darkness be a gift? And then when I was doing some inner work, something happened to bring the quote’s meaning home.
So as the ah-ha moment penetrated, I wrote this poem. A victim of domestic abuse from decades ago, the poem is based on these painful memories. And they have not, nor will they ever be forgotten or define me. I have forgiven, and moved on…..and this beautiful box full of darkness is now not something that holds me down or holds me back. No, instead it has freed me.
I am joining in with Poets United for their weekly poetry link up, Poetry Pantry, for poets who blog, and with Sanaa@A Dash of Sunny for her Prompt Nights every Friday. This week’s theme is “Passion makes the world go round”. Although this is a painful and dark poem, it is dealing with subjects passionate to my heart….forgiveness, letting go, resilience and healing. All important things happening in my life right now that I am passionate about on my journey.
I leave you with a few additional words about a box full of darkness. I welcome you to download the photo and share it.
All other photos and original content is copyrighted and the sole property of Donna Donabella @ Living From Happiness, 2014-2016. Any reprints or use of other photos or content is by permission only.